My First French Run

Bonsoir everyone! (bon-swa = good evening) It is Friday night and I am absolutely exhausted. I just got back from a night run. Oh, and I am sorry Mom and Ian if I sounded pissed off on the phone; it took me fucking forever to figure out this damn phone card. I seriously was cussing the phone booth out and it could have easily been a spot on France’s Funniest Home Videos. Again, I am sorry and I will try and call you soon again. Regarding the internet posts, it was so easy for me to log onto the internet in Italy because I had a school to go to with unlimited internet access and I have yet to figure out what is going to be the easiest way for me to post from Bois-Guillaume. Until then, cool it with the remarks when I talk to you guys….dammit.
This morning I had to get up at 830am to go the a doctor for a physical. Jean-Luc said that I have to do this in order to be covered by BG if I get hurt at the games/practices. So he pulls up in his little car and we are off. We are headed to an opposite suburb of Rouen where this doctor is. Jean-Luc is a friend of this doctor and said we should be in and out.
So we arrive and we have waited for a good hour. I finally go into a little room where the doctor is. He first checks my blood pressure and conducts normal procedures that I have had to do back in the states. He then tells me the same turn and cough procedure…you know what I am talking about. And then I had to do perform the same procedure on him……….JUST KIDDING. Haha, that reminds me of the Friends episode where Joey sends Chandler to his tailor and Chandler gets molested. “Yeah…that’s how they do it…IN PRISON!” Haha, well everything checked out and we headed back into town.
Jean-Luc then informed me that I would be on my own today because he had to go to his work. He works with the train transportation department in Rouen. So he gave me a map of the Rouen area and told me I could go lift at the gym and walk around if I wanted to. I was kinda like, “Shit”, but going out on my own is the only way I am going to familiarize myself with the place. So I went and I lifted and I stumbled onto something very unique.
On my walk to the gym , I passed a little children’s school, Ecoile. I saw a ton of kids in a fenced playground on recess. The kids that were hovering by the fence were yelling, “Bonjour” to me and other French remarks as well as waving at me. I smiled and yell Bonjour to them in return. So I finally got into the gym and I had it to myself. This is a very basic gym. Just raw equipment. But I really like it, this raw feeling is just what I want. So I start hitting it pretty hard. Soon enough a French man walks into the gym. He is a patrol officer of the complex and was asking what I was doing there. After a clusterfuck of hand gestures I finally get across that I am a baseball player and that I have permission. But to my surprise he didn’t leave. He just sat there at first and watched me workout. Flags started going up but I realize that he is just admiring the exercises that I am doing because after I was done with one machine, he would put the weight down and mimic the workout I was doing. We were both laughing at each other because I am sure none of us have had this type of experience. So then we try to communicate to each other. It felt like it was straight out of a movie. I would say something in English, he would mimic, and give me the word in French. We had to have talked and laughed for about an hour and a half. It was a really good experience. I think I have got the complete numerical French system down. He was laughing at my pronunciations and me at his. His name was Nadie. Alright, go ahead and start with the Mauricio comments because I know they are coming you fucking assholes. Let me ask you if you have ever lifted in a French weight room……..that’s what I thought. Fuck you.
After lifting I decided to go for a run. I was planning on running into Rouen to Jean-Luc’s house because he said it was only about 2 K. Kilometers are shorter than miles, noobs. So I was like “piece of cake” but do you think it was 2K? No. It fucking wasn’t. It might as well have been 5 miles.
“Ok Tony, run to Ozark.”
Dick.
Well I started out, people staring, exchanging bonjours, and listening to my music. At first, everything was good. It felt perfect. Taking in landscape, running past cathedrals, seeing vast green pastures. It was about 500pm when I started out and I was thinking that a combined 4k run wouldn’t be bad and I would get back to BG before dark. It was about 545pm when I started hitting the outskirts of Rouen. What the FUCK Jean-Luc! I had taken a long route. So I finally made it to his house and I was so fucking tired and it was starting to get dark. I was thinking, there better be someone home and I hope they would give me a ride back. Well there was someone home. It was Benedict. She greeted me and told me to come inside for water. So I sat down and watched a French game show with her and was just waiting for her to say,
“Need a ride back?”
Do you think it came? No.
After realizing that I was going to have run back I said my goodbye and walked dejectedly out of the house. Dammit…this was going to suck. It was dark as piss and I had to go back. So I started walking up a huge hill that I had ran down and was just reversing my route pretty much. I saw a different Bois-Guilloume sign shortly after my walk up and I realized I had to make a decision. Either to walk my original 5 mile route back or to take a chance with this hopeful shortcut. So I decided to take a chance with this shortcut and I couldn’t be happier that I did. THIS was the route Jean-Luc was telling me about. It drastically cut my time down and I arrived at my house in BG at about 800pm. BG is such a nice town that I had no worries of encountering trouble on my way back. Jean-Luc informs me everyday that everywhere in Normandy is really safe and that I have nothing to worry about.
I got back, peeled a huge orange that I bought, made some cheese ravioli, ate a piece of bread, and now I am writing you guys. I am going to put in Lord of the Rings and crash now. I love you guys and miss you so much. Au revoir for now and I will talk to you soon. Socre Bleu Lewis…out.